Friday was a government holiday; since I work for the government during the week (and all day on Fridays) I was looking forward to the paid vacation. I had the weekend off of my weekend job, and lots of plans for my three obligation-free days. Unfortunately, I’ve been in a haze of sickness since Wednesday- almost a full week now.
One of my earliest memories is crying hysterically when my mom told me to take off my school uniform and get back in bed. I was in Kindergarten and had chicken pox. I’ve always loved school, and I’ve been known to cry hysterically when I have to miss it. I hadn’t missed any of my classes this semester, but I didn’t even make it out of my bed Thursday. Today, I only made it through my morning classes before retreating to my bed in a disillusioned stupor.
I feel utterly miserable. When I get sick, I really go all out. I had to sit down in the shower because standing up was too hard. What is that nonsense? I hate being ill. I keep trying to do productive things with my time. I may be stuck in bed, unable to breathe and coughing uncontrollably, but I can still do things. Right? Apparently not. I tried to read, but holding the book was like propping up a boulder with toothpicks. It was a paperback. I felt ridiculous, and rather like Very Mary Kate.
I’ve done a lot of staring at the ceiling from the (un)comfort of my bed. I tried to do some writing. I wrote a poem about Zelda Fitzgerald. In the voice of Zelda Fitzgerald- Zelda Sayre, if I’m being honest to the feminist lens I put all over that poem. It featured the line “We are beautiful as we are damned” which was followed up by riotous laughter from my roommate.
I’m really working on getting well. Hopefully I’ll be back in school and back to regular blogging soon. I hope you’re healthy and happy!